Found this on my Tumblr blog. Migrating it here

A friend said, what I write comes under “freestyle poem” category…This time, this one, comes under “freestyle essay” category I guess ;) :D

Walking Alone

I don’t know when I
started walking alone.
I just know, I have
been doing it for a
long time since then.

Walking alone… in many
places and stages of life.
And each time, it has
been a different
experience for me.

When I walk alone,
I always feel boring.
Usual, isn’t it?
Consequently, I do some cool
things to kill boredom.
Actually, only two. :P
One is, I look at my watch.
The other is, I look at
people and surroundings.

Looking at my watch,
just means looking.
I don’t even look
at the time it shows.
I just “look” at it.
You have no idea.
I look at it for
about 5 times in
a minute or two, sometimes.
And when I am fed up
I look at the time it shows.
And this continues.

Same thing when it comes
to people and surroundings.
Most times, I just “look”
and not observe.

Then how can I have a different
experience each time?
You will get to know.

I wake up in the morning.
I get ready for college
and walk to the bus stop
to board the college bus.

Walking alone, I
look at newspaper boys,
milk vendors and vehicles.
And I look at my watch.
The minute and hour hands
swirl really fast.

And I find myself walking
on a road in the college,
leading to my first year block.
I usually walk with my bus mates.
But it’s an unusual day.
I walk alone…
looking at people walking
the same road
and nearby roads.
And I am actually walking fast.
Really fast. Why?
Well, I am walking alone.
I am bored. So, I wanna
reach my destination fast.

And sometimes, walking fast,
catches attention. And I
feel really awkward,
like, damn awkward, when
people are staring at me.
After a fast walk, I reach
my block. I climb the stairs,
like a monkey and enter my class,
smiling at people, shaking
my head and waving hands.
I sit at my place, look
at the time in my watch.
The hands in it
swirl really fast.

I find myself roaming around
the college, with classmates.
I walk alone even when they walk
with me. Well. I can’t help it.
I am considered boring and dumb.

Though I feel bad, I do understand it.
It’s because even I have ignored
people who look boring to me.
And I have felt bad about that
too. I am trying to change.

And while walking, I pass
by girls, actually, famous girls.
College guys make them famous.
And these girls, just go above
limits consequently. I don’t know
why, but I just feel dumb if I
look at them. I feel
“Are they the only girls? :P”
and I just look away and pass by,
unlike my classmates who get
hyper active and crazy,
and they call me dumb for this also.
I look at my watch,
the surroundings move backwards
and everything changes.

I find myself sitting alone
in a two seater seat, in
the college bus, returning home.
I am looking at the happenings
outside, as the bus moves.
I keep looking at the same
direction, with my eyes still,
almost staring, as the things
around move backwards
and let my thoughts flow.
The bus stops in traffic.
And I am staring at a place
on the road, a girl walks
that way and stops by,
to cross the road.
After a few seconds I
realize I have been staring
at a girl’s face and that
she is doing the same to me
and feeling awkward
and blushing, I look away.
And I say to myself
“You are dumb! :P facepalm”
I look at the time,
the bus and everything
moves backward and disappears.

I find myself walking alone,
to my house, from the bus stop.
It’s evening time. And very
less people are walking
on the road. And my city,
is a very insecure one.

There’s this girl, who
kept walking in front of
me and was going in the
same path, that I use to go home.
And she keeps turning back
and stares at me few times.
And that too, I was walking
fast as usual and I was trying
to slow down. But couldn’t.
Feeling upset about how she
thought about me, and feeling
bad about the city’s state of
security, I take a different path,
slightly longer one to reach
my home, just not to make her
feel uncomfortable.

After that, whenever I saw some
lady walk in front of me,
either I used to take a
different path, or just cross
the road and walk fast, past
them. Just to make them believe
I wasn’t following them. Even then,
there was a time when a lady almost
stopped by for a second when I walked
past her across a quite thin road.
Feeling really bad, I see my watch,
things go backwards and everything
disappears.

I find myself sitting at home, and
thinking about all the crazy and weird
things that I have done, while walking
and being alone. And feel bad about walking
alone even now. And I write about it.
I look at the clock, everything moves
backward and disappears.

And I find myself in my bed,
setting the alarm for the next day,
hoping to have a nice sleep.

– Karuppiah :)